Please, god of 49 year old men who feel the need to go to their college reunion and play in an alumni basketball tournament, I beseech thee.
Do not let him go in there and rip, tear, sprain or otherwise injure himself in an attempt to make himself feel younger than we all know he is. He will be tempted to do so, for he will be with other men his age who will all have similarly lost their damn minds and encourage him to do things that he KNOWS he should not so.
Hear me, for I will NOT nurse his wounded ass back to health, nor will I tolerate moaning and groaning about his sore muscles. I'm serious about this, oh god of college basketball reunions. For real.