Did I mention that we were out of Bleach?

Thursday, January 19, 2012

You know when you KNOW something? You know - as a parent. You see the event unfolding in your mind - step by step. No psychic flash or exciting event - just the parental spidey sense of "Oh Dear. This is not going to end well...."

The scene: Monday Morning, our house

There is no cereal ( more on that in another post) for breakfast. We are doing well on time. Showers are had. Bodies are dressed. I say, "Hey! Why don't we pop down to the bakery. We have time to pick up breakfast before school!"

Smiles abound. There are rainbows and bluebirds flitting about our heads.

I park and send Emily into the bakery. She gets a huge kick out of going in with the money in hand to order. Quite the "big girl" thing to do, you know. As she gets out of the car, she pauses. "Can I get some milk?", she asks.

Why sure! No problem! What kind of mother says No to milk?  Not me!

Then it happened. You know that moment...the one where you spot something and the realization sets in?

Um, yeah.

She walked out with chocolate milk.

Normally, I have no issue with a little container of the chocolate milk. Live and let live, I say. But Emily wears a uniform. And the shirt to that uniform is white.

Granted, the school is only three blocks away. Only.

You all can see where this is going, right? I know you can. We make it two blocks when the spill happens. The great drooling spill down the front of her. The big chocolate milk stain on the white shirt.

Which leads to wailing.


I keep my cool. I did, after all EXPECT this to happen. I calmly explain to her that she will most likely have to take a tardy slip at school, but that I would take her home to change. I can be a wench, at times, but I am not going to make her walk around in a stained shirt all day.

We get home. She goes into the house to change. She runs out in a lather, wailing loudly.


Fifteen minutes later, we have dug a white shirt that is LESS stained out of the dirty laundry. Apparently there ARE no other clean white shirts left.  The one shirt is serviceable - it will do for the day.

We get in the car and head back to school.

Emily reaches over for the carton of chocolate milk and begins to bring it to her lips.

"Are you KIDDING?!?!?!", I say. "Have you LOST your mind?"

She looks at me.


October 17, 2007 Gimlet Eye

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