Baby Brother

Monday, November 06, 2006

I've written a bit about my brother Donnie. You know, my co-designer of the game "Coma"?

Ok, newbies. I now give you several minutes to piece this bit of high hilarity together. Yep. His name is Donnie. And my name is Dawn. Will it surprise you further to know that our mother and father are Donna and Donald, respectively?

Collect yourselves. Is it any wonder that two children with name origins such as these ended up with the odd and warped humor that produced the game coma? I mean, I view it as a pure defense mechanism. If you are already mocking the sad heathens who inhibit most of society, how can their derision at your matching names affect you?

My brother is 4 years younger than I. I honestly recall the day they brought him home from the hospital. He was a bundle of scrunched up fists and hair. He had a scream that could wake the dead. They set me on a chair and set him on my lap. I have no doubt I was wholly unimpressed.

Donnie was a fairly easy going kid. I do remember when he was of crawling age that he stashed away several marbles in his cheeks and proceeded to choke quite spectacularly in the middle of the living room. As my mother had him upside down and banging the shit out of his back, I remember the blue tinge to his face and the marbles rolling out of his mouth onto the floor. He also tended to taunt death by running into the ocean, sans life preserver, running into traffic and occasionally falling out of the truck when my mom would take left hand turns. Oh and that scary month when he was 2ish and had spinal meningitis.

Donnie slept with his butt up in the air. He did this until he was probably five. You would walk into his room and find him, Legs tucked under his belly, butt up in the air. Because of this, he almost always wore footie pajamas. My mother gave up trying to keep him covered. He had a "wa-wa" - a blue silk edged blanket that he loved. I bet it is still in the attic at my moms house, along with my "banky".

Donnie, it should not surprise any of you, didn't do alot of talking. As the brother of a bossy, verbal older sister, he rarely needed to talk. I talked for him. It wasn't as if he Couldn't talk. he could. But why expend the energy when I was perfectly willing to convey his needs to everyone?

Donnie was motion. He ran, he jumped, he rode his big wheel. He later played lacrosse and I loved to watch him on the field, all six plus feet of him in full motion.

Of course, at a certain point, our lives diverged. Being older, I was mostly annoyed by this person who infringed on my television choices and my proprietary right for all attention as eldest child. I knew that to ask Donnie for a "sip" or a "taste" of something would drive him Nuts. He didn't want your germs on his food. I also knew that if he was on the couch, I could wiggle my toes under him until he got disgusted and left, allowing me to spread out. I would run into his bedroom in the middle of the night because his snoring was so damn loud and poke him until he stopped.

I went to college...he went to college. He moved away from home, I moved back home. I moved away, got married. He moved to Boston and started a career after several years on the ski/summer resort cooking circuit.

We email, and there is no one on this earth who can make me laugh like he does. With simply a few words.

This is the email I got today:

"Look outside, is it getting dark? Do you see a swarm of locusts coming? Perhaps the 4 horseman descending upon you? Is it the apocalypse right around the corner?

No, but I did get engaged this weekend.

Perhaps there is a chance for peace in the Middle East after all."

Can't you tell we sprung from the same source?

I love you Donnie, and wish your betrothed all the love and patience and sense of humor she will need to swim in our gene pool. If needed, she and Terrance can commiserate while you and I throw old hip hop references and other inside jokes around to our hearts content.

15 Baleful Regards:

Anonymous said...

You have a brother and that makes you lucky in my book. In addition, he's someone you love and admire and he makes you laugh. Pure gold, Dawn. Pure gold.

Anonymous said...

It would be AWESOME if her name was Teri.

Best wishes to co-coma-creator!

Table4Five said...

I can't help it-re: Madge's comment, why Teri?

Congrats to your bro.

Lisa said...

See? THIS is why I so very badly want another child. Because Seth NEEDS another person to antagonize. (Bothering the dog has become far too easy. There's no challenge left! heehee.)

Congrats to your brother. And I think that's the most beautiful part of a sibling relationship... Getting together to make fun of your parents and laugh about the stupid stuff you did as kids.

Mignon said...

I know your mom was reading here, but if you are still, Donna, huh? Did you all have matching track suits too?

Congratulations to your brother... the locusts are still hibernating as long as my little brother is still single.

Bobita said...

Bobita, here. Child victim of a family who was called "the 4 B's." Agony! Sheer agony.

Loved your bro's email. My best to him!

Mitzi Green said...

aw, that's sweet. i wish i had a relationship like that with any of my siblings.

as for naming your kids for the sake of alliteration, my 2 sisters and i all have names that begin with "A." and my brother's name is eric. which made for great fun when our mom was pissed and spent 7 minutes stuttering through each of our names trying to get the right one.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Donnie! A plague of frogs to you both!

Anonymous said...

I love this post for many reasons:

1) The Dawn/Donnie/Donna/Donald thing just kills me.

2) I can feel the love you have for your brother through your words. Really. I can feel it.

3) It seems that Oliver and Donnie have quite a bit in common and from the sounds of it, your mother emerged from the ocean-dashing, marble swallowing and spinal meningitis relatively unscathed. This gives me hope for my future.

4) Donnie's email is hysterical. Congrats to him and his fiancee!

Mommygoth said...

Great news! Tell Donnie to come do a guest interview with Vlad - I'd love to read that.

halloweenlover said...

Congrats to Donnie! Great news!

Someone else to torture, no?

Anonymous said...

It's posts like this that make me want to have another child.

Fraulein N said...

Congrats, Donnie!

Marcie said...

No shit?! Dawn, Donnie, Donna and Donald.
That's the coolest!

Anonymous said...

Congrats to Donnie. I think I see the locusts heading this way now...

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