I fucking hate you

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Yeah. I know my fur was really matted. I know I wouldn't let you come it and I would swat at you when you came anywhere near me with the "de-tangler" comb.

But BITCH. This is what you do to me?







You take me to a fucking cat groomer? Stank ass whore is more like it - and she Shears me to this humiliating state? You paid money for her to do this to me? I would have been happier if you had shoved that 60 bucks directly up your ass.

In fact, watch your back bitch. Cause I plan on shoving something up your ass - once my coat grows back and I stop looking like a mange infested chihuahua.



You might want to give your pillow a sniff test every time you go to lie down on it, you dirty whore, cause I plan on pissing - ALOT.



And letting her leave this puff on my stumpy ass tail. Not Fucking Cool.

Revenge will be mine.

24 Baleful Regards:

Bethany said...

Holy hell, that's the best laugh I've had all weekend!

Ellie's Mommie said...

Oh my god! I about shot salad & cucumber ranch out my nose! That's great! I needed a good laugh! Thank you!

SUEB0B said...

Hide your shoes. They WILL crap in your shoes. I know.

ayasud said...

Yiyiyiyi! Poor kittus!

Nancy said...

Oh yes, that is one pissed off feline.

Pendullum said...

I'm with SueB0b..Hide your shoes...
She is going to do a number on you after the number you did on her...
I am so with your cat...
and laughing at its misfortune... but it will get its revenge... just wait for it!!!

kat said...

I too had a long haired cat - and when he would get matted, I would get him shaved. He LOVED it. He'd run thru the house in kitten mode and be the most affectionate cat ever. Now - this cat of yours - I would be scared of. Suggest you not fall asleep in a room with him...Be Afraid - Be VERY afraid.

Dinosaur Mom said...

My ex-husband and I had himalayans and seeing them shaved was my favorite laugh ever. If loving this is wrong, I don't want to be right.

JayMonster said...

Do you think other cats look at your cat now and wonder if kitty joined a weird religious cult?

sparklykatt said...

Ah yes, we had to do that to our kitty last spring. It took over a week for one of our other cats to stop hissing at him.

http://sparklykatt.blogspot.com/2006/05/wardrobe-malfunction_10.html

Here's our naked fluff ball.

Angie said...

Oh man... I did this to my cat a month ago and he's still ignoring me. Bahahah!! Looks like your groomer did a better job than mine! Your guy should be grateful!

Fraulein N said...

Oh god damn. God DAMN, that is funny. The little shaved body ... and then the giant-looking furry head ... hee.

That cat is totally plotting to kill you right now. HEE.

velocibadgergirl said...

OMG. OMFG I nearly sprained my face trying not to howl with laughter at my desk. This shit needs to be marked NSFW.

TB said...

Aw, he looks like a poodle.

But you can't let him outside now, can you?

Elizabeth said...

It looks like the poor kitty is wearing a very tight-fitting gray velour sweater! I do believe those are laser beams of evil shooting out of his eyes. Watch your back, and don't leave any piles of clothes on the floor or they WILL get pissed on.

Lisa said...

YOu might want to check your shoes before you slip them on EVERYDAY for the next two years....

theotherbear said...

Bwahahaha - classic!

Mitzi Green said...

f the bears--i want a t-shirt with THAT on it.

Woman with kids said...

You know the cat is evil, so why do you continue poking at it? I mean, other than the fun of poking at things...

Jenny said...

Bwahahahahaaaaaaa!

Love you, mama.

jen frm boston said...

she's saying, "why don't you go back to your home on Whore Island!"

hee. oh god that was funny.

Rebecca said...

HAHAHAHAHA!

Suburban Gorgon said...

Oh no, you didn't!

Anonymous said...

DawnAnn That is really funny, your cat definitely has "Tude"
Ma

 
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